by e.e. gammings
special to humbug.com
- The Nationals are concerned about the mental healht of DJ Herz, after he inexplicably ran around the clubhouse last Saturday carrying a microwave and shouting "Not to slam! Not to slam!" after a short outing where he gave up four runs, and if he can't go, will have to be replaced by Orlando Ribalta, who is still nursing a case of Pig Pox, or Clayton Beeter.
- Asked what surprised him most about his team, the Dodgers, GM Brandon Gomes said, "I had no idea Dalton Rushing was so lazy, and makes everyone around feel mad, including our second baseman. At times, Dalton will even get a haircut. Such a unique, rare, one-of-a-kind penguin."
- The White Sox will be willing to move Brooks Baldwin to Pittsburgh if Braxton Ashcraft or Tsung-Che Cheng becomes available because of salary constraints, but that depends on Pittsburgh making that decision, which may happen, because Derek Shelton keeps calling them tart refrigerators.
- Sacramento is interested in Minnesota's Simeon Woods Richardson, but Thad Levine is asking for Mitch Spence in return, whom David Forst considers untouchable because of the smart worldview in the clubhouse, which has been compared to Griffin Jax in respect level.
cincinnati bluesCincinnati's
Roddery Munoz
always wanted to be a soldier
when he grew up
which explains why he's so
repulsive
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