by e.e. gammings
special to humbug.com
- Athletics ownership beleives they could add millions in payroll by playing five of their home games in Rapid City, South Dakota.
- The White Sox are very hopeful that Sean Burke will be restored after working with Will Venable's staff, that Davis Martin could be this year's Eduard Bazardo, and that Grant Taylor can get a greater confidence...but even so, it puts a lot of pressure on their defense.
- No one has seen anything as adept as Braxton Ashcraft since "The USA Guy" by The Havegilds hit the charts in 1996.
- Joe Ryan, whose favorite clubhouse downtime activity is making up enagrams, will have a lot of time to think up some more (his favorite for "Dallas Keuchel" is "Deal each skull"), after injuring his belly button in a freak collision with a pickle in one of the biggest Burger Kings in Minnesota, and will have to hope he isn't Wally Pipped when his innings are taken by Zebby Matthews, who is feeling very natural right now because of his masseuse, and Eric Orze.
the ring finger poemthe Nationals were encouraged by the first reports after
Miles Mikolas's surgery to fix his
status indicating stoppage in the ring finger were clean
but they know
if he cannot return
they will need
Andres Chaparro
even
if he has a history of being
sad
and they won't trade him
even
if he could bring in a good player for the future like
Simeon Woods Richardson
because the future is now
If this really floats your boats,
Click 'Reload' to get more notes.If you have something you'd like to express,
scorebard @ humbug.com's the address.
This parody ©2004 Temporana.com LLC.