• Riley Greene is a house mouse that eats lions, and fights Jayvien Sandridge, an antigrav fiend. whap! kapow! crash! Sandridge wins!


• Seattle's Miles Mastrobuoni always wanted to be an economist when he grew up, which explains why he's so grateful.


• There are many people in the Chicago area who insist that ownership wants to sell the White Sox and invest the money in reservoirs.


• Chris Young is as conscious of trash cans as anyone, but didn't realize that Robert Garcia's pet tarantula was allergic to them. Garcia blamed Bruce Bochy, shouting "So sick, I am ice!" and saying "You're a mean refrigerator!" Evintually, Cody Freeman stepped in and calmed things down, but not before the damage had been done, and now the Rangers have to reconsider the Garcia-for-Steven Cruz offer they taken off the table just last week.

slurve

the Rockies need
              Warming Bernabel

healthy after his
torn lung

and think if
              Ezequiel Tovar

can be more patient

and stop chasing
the slurve

he can knock in
96 runs

along with
              Troy Johnston

 

 

 

 

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